February 2004 Archives

Getting psychologically ready for tonight... I cannot WAIT any longer... The place is probably going to be a bit empty because there's another big Psy Trance night on at Stratford Rex, but that's just better...
So, tonight... I'm wearing a nice, low-cut pink t-shirt (you never know, I could meet the love of my life, better be prepared *lol*), my usual Levis, pink Adidas trainers, my big plastic necklace (it's made out of big, red plastic balls, it's soooo cool), wristband (the red and white stripey one), pigtails... Bwahahah. Perfect clubbing outfit. XD Very exciting. It's going to be such a wicked night... Kirsty is going to come out with us in the end, and Dee is bringing a few mates...
So, yeah, I've got no other news apart from this. I just had to share my excitement. ;)

I'm soooooo incredibly tired. Don't really know why... Spending the day at uni always kills me. :/
So, we watched another Thai film today, called Naang Nak. A ghost film! It was quite good, but most of all interesting. Basically in Thai legends and stories ghosts are always female as they are a representation of society's fears... Women getting angry! Bwahahah. Even my Southeast Asian Politics tutorial was interesting... About resistance and avoidance by the peasants in Malaysia in the 70s and 80s, an idea we then generalized to the whole world. For once I really felt involved... :)
I can't wait for tomorrow night. I'm so excited, I haven't been to a Psy Trance in night in more than... Two months? Which is absolutely ridiculous! Nevermind that I'm slightly worried about seeing Ryan tomorrow night. Ok, let me rephrase that. I'm absolutely terrified.
And now I'm off to eat my chinese from last night (I'm not eating it cold, don't worry, I haven't got to that point yet XD) and watch Eastenders, Friends, Will & Grace, Sex and The City and... Who knows after that? I love Friday night telly. :)
I'm so sad hey? *lol*

Yesterday just went REALLY wrong... *lol* Sophie called at around 4.30 to invite me for a drink in Shoreditch with Fred... I went, and got back 5 hours later completely drunk! Started smoking, kept drinking, watched Bill Hicks (again! It's the third time but he's too brilliant), and then Kirsty and Tom came over and it was just a lot of screaming/laughing/talking bollocks. Very good fun. My only problem? I'm a moron because I forgot to watch ER. *sniff* I can't believe I missed it again! I AM A MOROOOOOON. ;___;
Anyway. I've had the 'I'm bored of it' thing from my mates when I talked about Val last night, so I'm not talking about him anymore. :p Even though I still think he's fit, nice, cute, etc. etc. Fuck him! I'm single! I don't want all that mess with men again. :p
It's obviously not going to work, but if I stop looking... At least...
Pleseuccia, grazie per i consigli... Dovrei proprio cominciare ad andare in palestra sai, e' una buona idea! Sono secoli che ci penso e non comincio mai... Il problema e' sempre cominciare! E poi se andassi in palestra perderei un paio di chiletti e sarei una strafigona e rimorchierei un sacco! Bwahahah. Magari...
Lucio, mi sa che hai proprio ragione! E poi io nella reincarnazione qualche volta ci credo pure. :) Devi troppo farmi i tarocchi sai? Eheheheh... :))

I finally found out that instead of deleting annoying spam comments post by post I could do it in bulk from PHPmyAdmin. Bwahahah.
Still here, still happy/unhappy. I wanna know why my sentimental life is such a big deal to me, I mean, I'm alright on my own ain't I? Why do I have to torture myself thinking about guys? They're all bastards anyway! There you go. I am single and happy. More or less.
I need to do something useful today. But what, what? I could start reading stuff for my courses and my next essays... I could... But I'll start by cooking myself something because I'm starving.
Talk about useless posting hey?

I've got nothing to do right now. Uni on strike, so no tutorials or lectures today and tomorrow (one of lecturers is working anyway but I don't really feel like crossing the picket line, you know, all these people ARE paid nothing, they're right to strike).
I keep thinking about the weekend... And guess about who! *lol* I shouldn't be talking about this stuff, because some of Fred's friends do know about the blog and bla bla bla, and I shouldn't talk about things like this but... I really do not give a fuck anymore. I want to say what I think and that's it.
Now, a question that I find interesting... Ok, imagine you've gone out with a girl/guy once, for like a couple of weeks. A year later, you like one of her/his friends. Should you not do anything because she/he is a friend of theirs and you used to go out? I'm sorry but it doesn't make any sense to me. No sense at all. What difference does it make anyway, you're not going out with that person anymore and it was all a long time ago... Pisses me off.
I NEED to meet someone. I really really really need to. I feel lonely, I feel... Unloved, boring, whatever. I want some intimacy, closeness, I need a kiss, I need sex. I miss everything about being with someone... And right now I've got no options whatsoever. Boring boring boring. I know it's stupid that I feel like shit only because I'm single, but I can't stand it. I can't stand being on my own...
And I wanna stop moaning/whining as well! AAAAAAH!

My host fucked up for a day or so, so I couldn't post... But now I can, finally! I can't wait to change hosts for this, if it wasn't for the fact that I'll need to reinstall movable type. Argh.
Anyway, Kent was absolutely wicked... A few people there, Kirsty, Fred, Tom C., his flatmate Val, Tom M. and a girl called Ali (a schoolmate of Fred's). We drunk a lot, smoked a lot, played a lot of stupid games and stayed up until 7 in the morning... It was fun, and Fred's house is amazing! So terribly English... And he's got a lovely garden and this huge field behind his house... And the Eurostar tracks are just at the end of it! So next time I go home I'll have to watch out for the house... Eheheh. Tom C. stole my bed so I had to sleep on the sofa, but it was rather comfy... I still gave him loads of hassle because of that though, lol!
Now, the problem with last weekend is... Why do I have to like a guy every single time I do something??? I was talking to Val for a while and we were smoking together, just the two of us, and it was nice... He's got a really sweet accent and a nice smile... Nothing happened, obviously, but see, I'm just tired of this, I can't be bothered. It happens every time, I always find someone to fancy! Grrrr. I can be so stupid. But yeah, at least I've got something nice to think about before going to sleep and I can stress a tiny bit less about having to talk to Ryan on Saturday night. Apparently he told Kirsty he really appreciated my letter. Mmh. That was the only good thing I did during our relationship, I think. :)
We definitely have to do this Kent thing again, that is if Fred's parents don't mind... We did tidy up quite a lot before leaving but it was still a bit of a mess... Ops. :)

Peter Andre' has re-released Mysterious Girl. Bwahahah. Talk about a long time ago! 1996... I remember actually liking the song... *lol* Don't worry, I'm better now, I still like shit music but not Peter Andre'... XD
The flat is in a complete mess but I can't be bothered to clean anything. Mpfh.
Friday is a such a great day. I spend it drooling almost non-stop. I love having fit guys in my classes. XD I've got the French guy (very tall, with a pretty face and blond dreadlocks) and the American Guy (who looks like a sweeter version of Colin Farrell, and I swear, he REALLY REALLY does). Mmh. My hormones are working again, there's no doubt about that. On a more serious note: Ryan is going to be at Sinergy Project next Saturday, and he wants to 'talk to me'. I don't wanna see him, I don't wanna realize I still like him, I don't wanna talk to him because what I'd really like to do is insult him but I know I won't have the energy or the courage to do so. I feel like such a little girl, still not over him, why is taking me so long? I have whole weeks when I don't even think about him and then something comes out that reminds me of him and it just starts playing with my head... It sucks.
Tomorrow I'm going to Kent for... well, a day. Fred's parents are away somewhere so we've got his house all for us. It's going to be... Fred, Tom M., the other Tom, Kirsty and me. And maybe other people but I'm not sure. Should be fun... James was supposed to come but he doesn't have any money (literally, NO money, he's been going around London on his bike), which doesn't make me happy at all. :/ I miss James. I know I'm repeating myself but... I do miss Dinwiddy. And it's not that I don't like living here, I love it to bits, I love the flat, my room, living with Soph and Paul... But I'd like to be a first year again, careless and a bit stupid, going back to a building full of students and alcool and weed and mess mess mess. It was fun. It was the first time in my life I was truly satisfied with my life.
I guess I've moaned enough now? *lol* Anyway, I'll see you all on Sunday! This Kent-thing better be good because I'm spending 20 quid on the train ticket. Can you believe it, 20 £ (return) for a journey of about an hour and a half. Fucking ridiculous. Stupid English trains. :)
By the way, go here and give lots of love to Cat! ;)

My essay is finished. 1620 words and it's shit, it truly is. I know I say this every time, but this time it's true. Sniff. I don't care anymore. At least I can hand it in tomorrow and that's it. I've given up being particularly brilliant in that class, there's no chance. Too much stuff and too little knowledge in Southeast Asia in general. I'm still enjoying it though...
Lalala. Now I can have a spliff and wait for Six-Feet Under on tv. Me is happy.

My essay is already one day late. But today I'll do it, I'll overcome the laziness and tomorrow it's going to be in. I promise.
Paul found a packet of Ronhill Lights that he bought in Slovakia. I smoked one and it was just such a trip down memory lane... It made me remember... Sitting in a thousand different bars in Croatia with Jana, and sometimes Rene', and sometimes other people... I realize now that... Those weeks in Croatia... I was really happy then. Just happy. Happy because we were hitchiking and meeting amazing people and spending nights on the street or the beach and having dirty feet in my flip flops and talking a lot and just feeling nice... I can't wait to go to Venice. I really can't wait.
Had a very pleasant evening yesterday. Went to Hampsted, and I cannot believe I had never been there. Imagine mixing your typical London scenario with a Disney town, and you're not even nearly there yet. It's amazing, and that's probably why a one bedroom flat is about 250,000 £. Ah ah ah. Anyway, I've changed the plans for the rest of my life (yeah, I do have plans. More or less). Finish uni, find a job with an NGO, travel all over Africa and Asia, meet a rich and fit guy, come back to London and settle down in a nice big house in Hampstead. What do you think? Sounds nice to me. *lol* I wish, seriously. The only idea of finding a proper job when I finish uni scares me soooo much.
I need to go down to Safeways, I really need to. I need tissues and fruits and pineapple juice and yogurt and decent bread and wheetos. And I have no money because I need 50 £ to go down to Kent this weekend and at the same time I'm trying to save a bit of money every week. Bollocks. I guess I just won't eat. Or I'll eat our last packet of pasta or something. I'll find something.
So, yeah. I'll have a bath and then I'll do my essay, and it's going to be good and nice and finished by tonight. Yes yes yes.

I can't believe it. One of my parents' best friends died last night. They had known him forever; he was one of those people I remember the most from my childhood in Rome. He was extremely funny and such a lovely person... And now he's died; I think he had cancer... I saw him last summer, and I remember him making us laugh so hard... He had a lovely boyfriend as well; he was the one who called my dad this morning to tell him, and he was in complete shock... I just can't believe it, you know... It's not even that I knew him that well, but he was part of so many of my memories and everytime we talked about him it made me smile... I don't know, I don't want to make this into a lamenting post, I'm just very sad...
Per Sergio...

My domain still isn't working. Apparently it's not fully propagated yet. Who knows! I'm slightly pissed off, but well. The fact that it's not working also means that I can't start changing all the urls in the rings and sending emails to all the people who link me... Huuuuge hassle.
Someone has convinced me to change a couple of things in my computer... So now I'm using Trillian and mozilla firefox. Trillian is not the best but it's useful and with a decent (pink XD) skin it looks alright. Firefox is EXCELLENT, a lot better than previous versions of Mozilla, and even better than IE 6. Me is very satisfied.
Still haven't started my essay, still haven't finished my readings, but... As soon as I finish the article I'm reading right now I should be able to write the damn thing. Worse case scenario, I miss my tutorial tomorrow or a lecture on Wednesday. I really am too lazy, I need to wake up a bit and do some work...
Now I'm off to the cinema with my dad, to see 21 Grams. It's supposed to be really good... Let's hope so. :)

Ciclamino.net isn't working. Blah. Me is not happy.
This is absolutely brilliant. I've tried half of the sitcoms I know and it works every time... I wonder if it works with Eastenders? Or Home and Away? I'll try it out. Bwahahah.
Tonight I've had some really nice cous cous with merguez and moroccan cakes. And mint tea. I have to buy some mint tea, the real stuff, it's soooo nice. I have to find out if mint tea has any caffeine in it though, because I like to drink a cup of tea before going to sleep... And my decaffeinated chai is almost finished... I'll have to look for that next week. :)

I have an announcement to make. vsp.nu, my collective of almost 4 years, is expiring next month. So, I am presenting you with my new domain & collective, ciclamino.net! Enjoy. :)
(and please change your bookmarks)
[edit] Bollocks. I don't know why but the domain is not working at the moment (and it's the second time it happens in a couple of hours). I blame it on the fact that I've just registered it. Let's hope for the best. [/edit]

I always do this. Come to Paris when the good raves are on. :/ Last night I missed Fairy tales @ the Renaissance Rooms... I got a text from both Sophie and Paul, saying they missed me there. :) At least I feel loved! *lol* I couldn't have gone anyway because of this fucking cold, but it's still a shame.
I wish I was a kid again, because when you're a kid you believe you can be anything, anything in the world. When I was a little girl I wanted to be a model, an architect, an interior designer, a manga-ka... A million different things. I truly believed I could have been any of them. Now I know what I want to do (work in an NGO), but I don't know if I will be able to (with just a BA and in a situation where thousands of people are doing degrees related to NGOs and Development Studies). It sucks. I've got less than a year and a half left before I have to find a proper job. I don't know what it will be and I don't know where it will be, and to tell you the truth I'm terrified. Absolutely terrified.
Apart from that, I've been walking around in my new high heels in the flat in the hope that I can get used to them (isn't happening), last night I ate my mum's tarte-tatin à la mangue (which is the best thing in the world), yesterday I also went to the cinema to see Buongiorno, notte (it was interesting because I didn't know much about the Brigate Rosse and Aldo Moro, but it was a bit deceiving... In the film everything was simplified so much it didn't make sense anymore) and... My cold is finally a bit better! Maybe IT WILL be gone by Tuesday?
Today I have to force myself to finish my readings for my essay. I could start writing it tomorrow and then I would still have Tuesday morning/late afternoon. And then I have to hand it in on Wednesday. Mmh. Sounds cool.

My parents have been married for 33 years. Today! Can you imagine? I don't think I'll want to stay married to someone for so long... I don't believe in soulmates, and I think that love is more a question of building a relationship and getting to know someone... It doesn't mean that you're going to love that person forever. It could stop at any time... Mmh. I don't know, it's a quite confusing subject.
I noticed this morning how long my hair is. I don't think it's ever been so long... When I was a kid it was always short, and the last time I had it really long I was about... 15 or 16, and it was red at the time, but I really don't think it was as long as it is now. I can't really see myself as a long-hair type of girl, but maybe I am. (this probably doesn't make any sense to you but it does to me!)
I did a bit of shopping with my mum... I finally found a butter dish! And I also bought a pair of boots (not high boots, ankle-high ones) for 10 euros. Which is good because I'll wear them maybe twice in the next year, because their heels are ridiculously high. :) And a very nice top for 7 euros. I'm a happy girl, even though my cold is as bad as yesterday. Sniff. I hate having this, I'm really not used to it. I hope it's going to be gone by Tuesday, when I get back to London...

So everything is organised for Easter. My holidays are March 19-April 19 so... I know there is good psy trance night on the 20th and I'm in London for that; then on the 22nd I leave for Venice (yahoooo!) to see my beloved Jana and I get back on the 27th (there weren't any cheap tickets for the 28th and this way I can also go out on the 27th, lol). The ticket ended up being pricey (60 £) but my mum was alright with it so. And it makes me incredibly happy and I know it'll be worth it! I can't wait to be down there... :) I decided that I can't do both, Milan and Venice, it would be just too many hours spent travelling for just 5 days so... It's a shame but Venice is my top priority right now because being with Jana makes me feel special and I need to feel it again. It's not something I can explain with words; she just makes life wonderful and surreal. :) Then after that I'm staying in London for a couple of days and coming down to Paris on the 31st, and then we're going to Tuscany on the 9th of April I think... And getting a flight back to London from Bologna on the 17th. Quite a lot of travelling hey... But it should be fun and this way I won't get bored because I'm not staying anywhere for more than a week!
So the organisation for Easter is out of the way which is a big relief. I'm in Paris, the train journey was a nightmare because I couldn't blow my nose as often as I wanted to (lack of tissues) and I feel asleep in a very awkward position while listening to psy trance, so when I woke up I was hurting and I was confused. I'm still blowing my nose every 3 minutes or so, the skin on my nose is becoming red and peeling off and I'm tired of this cold. Go away!
That was good. I needed to whine a bit. :) I've done a bit more work for my essay; I've done half of the readings and the essay is taking shape inside my head. I know what I need to talk about, now I only need more information and details. Lalala. I've read all the comments from my past essays and it seems like my big problem is always the introduction. So I need to take more care in writing in my introductions from now on. :)
It's weird. I've met someone through faceparty, and he's like... My long lost twin. We were separated at birth, I think. We've got the same little obsessions, and a thousand little things in common. I've spent the last two nights chatting to him until very very late, and it was nice... I felt like a 13 year old again! (but then it's alright because I still am a teenager for another 6 months and to tell the truth, I don't wanna become an adult! *lol*) But it's just... Lovely. And weird. I'm a bit confused and don't really know what to do; we might meet up next week which should be... Fun? :)

I've decided not to go to my brother's in the end; I just feel weak and ill and I don't think spending an hour or more on the bus would help it in any way. But it pisses me off though, I really wanted to go, some social life... And I wanted to see my brother's flat and then... Well, it was nice of him to invite me over so I feel a bit guilty about letting him down, sort of... I don't know. And then I had to pick up his birthday present for my mum... I hope I can pick it up tomorrow morning or something.
I'm not feeling good at all at the moment. I am quite happy to go home tomorrow afternoon and being taken care of for a couple of days... It's weird, how much more I miss my parents this year. They're lovely. I love my mum and dad! :))) I absolutely have to find a good idea for my dad's birthday present... And I have about a day to think of something. :/ I should have thought about it before, I know, but I just didn't have time... I feel bad! Papino non ti preoccupare ti trovero' un bellissimo regalo!!! I hope... ^^
This afternoon I was checking the prices of laptops... Basically now I could buy a laptop that is a lot better than the one I have now for about 500 euros less than what I paid about 18 months ago. Not fair!

I woke up this morning with a headache, clogged up nose, dry lips and even drier throat. Not nice, a cold, just now that I have to go home. Well, at least my parents are going to take good care of me... Bwahahah. The fact that I was up until 4 last night chatting didn't help I think... It was the first time I stayed up so late to chat to someone in like... Years? It's nice to find someone you can talk to for so long.
Jana my amatissima, I'm happy you like the flat... I wish you could come here before I leave... We could even sleep in my big double bed, lol. Anyway, I'll organise this thing for Easter during the week-end. Ryanair rules! :) Oh and don't worry about the email darling, I think your exams are a lot more important! :* It's nice to get emails that make you smile... I love it. :)
Tonight I am supposed to go to my brother's flat in Maida Vale. I feel like shit and I'll have to change tube twice (and it's going to take me an hour as well), but I think I'll go, it should be nice. And I really want to see his flat (he lives in Little Venice! How cool is that?).
AAAAH GO AWAY YOU HORRIBLE COLD GO AWAY LEAVE ME ALONEEEEEEEEE... *sniff*

I'm trying to organise my Easter holidays so... I'm going to Paris on the 31th of March, then we're going to Italy and I'm getting back to London from there, by plane (Ryanair rocks my socks!). But before that I've got another two free weeks, so my plan is... To go to Milan for a week-end (I need to see loads of people there...), and then go to Venice to see my beloved-darling Jana whom I miss dearly for a couple of days! Again, taking advantage of cheap Ryanair tickets. Sounds good doesn't it? I hope I can work it out. :)
So, Kerry won I'm a celebrity get me out of here. She's such a nutcase, I'd love to get pissed with her. *lol* She really deserved it (even though Jennie Bond was really great as well...). So, again I've been watching shit tv! Yay!
Now that I've finished cleaning the flat (absolutely EVERYTHING is spotless or almost, including corners and the oven and the bathtub and the door frames...) I've had to start doing my readings for my essay. This time it's about whether the Communist Party in Vietnam has retained legitimacy or not... Passionating, yes. -__-

The day became a lot better after my mum's call, because I got to sleep another 4 hours completely undisturbed... *grin* I then went out to buy some stuff for the flat (I couldn't find the only thing I really needed, which was a big basket to put all the newspapers and random bits and bobs we've got on the floor in the living room...), so now we've got four more big glasses and two bowls... I love buying stuff for this flat; it's just such an amazing little flat. I wish I could buy it and make it up, it would look so good... But I can't do that so I just cleaned it all in the last few days! Now I've only got the bathroom floor and the bath to clean. I even cleaned the oven, which is the most disgusting job ever. Blah.
I thought I had that throat infection I had back in June again, but apparently it's gone, or almost.
I also found out that our electricity company fucked us over! They gave us an estimated reading (and made us pay 82 £ for three months), which was more than 200 units over the actual reading. Bastards! I gave them my reading so we should have about 20 £ off the next bill. Mmh. I feel so responsible, lol, doing stuff like that. Yeah, I'm useless for this stuff! I've also sent off the application to vote for the European elections here. Finally, I'll be able to vote! I can't believe I've turned 18 more than a year ago and I still haven't voted. I want to use my rights!!!
When I got back from little shopping trip I found out I didn't have any cereals left, so I went out to the newsagent down the road. Old Hill Street is such a nice street, with its tiny houses and all the shops. It's just so London you know? I think I'm falling in love with London again and I'm falling in love with this neighbourhood as well. It's a bit skanky, ok, but it's so true, it's got character. Nice houses and streets and so on... Our building is so nice as well. Oh yeah, by the way, you can see it here, with the snow! I've added loads of pictures to the gallery. Lots of parties and snow! ^_^ I need to take more pictures of the streets around my flat though...

If there is one thing I hate is being woken up at 8.30 in the morning by my mother who wants me to organise my Easter holidays in two minutes and starts yelling at me when I've got no idea of when my Easter holidays are because it's fucking 8.30 in the morning, I'm sleepy and I couldn't care less.
Blaaaaaaaaah. >_< Pessimo inizio per la giornata, pessimo. And she made so angry I punched the table and now my hand is hurting. Grrr. Horrible day. There's no fucking way I am going out now. No fucking way.

I have to download Where's your head at by Basement Jaxx. I love that song. Mmh. I think it's in Human Traffic's soundtrack as well... I absolutely love that film... I watched last week for the first time and now I SO want to watch it again. Mmh. It's a loooovely film. :)
I've been watching too much telly... Especially now that I'm all on my own in the flat. Instead of studying, I'm watching tv. -__- Wanna know all the programs I regularly watch (I know you don't, but I'll tell you anyway)? Well... Home and Away (5 days a week), Eastenders (4 days a week), ER (once a week), Six-Feet Under (once a week), Family Affairs (5 times a week), Property Ladder (once a week), Grand Designs (once a week), Friends (once-twice a week), Will & Grace (once a week)... Then you've got the ones I watch from time to time... I'm such a freak. XD
Ok, let's stop talking about my sad sad sad life. I've decided that after reading week I'll start going out more and find myself a LOVER. Bwahahah. Yes, I need a love life/sex life again. No more depression, no more thinking nobody will ever love me, bla bla bla. So yeah, you'll only get random babbling for me tonight. I'll go back to my telly... I still have to watch I'm a Celebrity get me out of here tonight!!!

I just received an email that makes me smile, from someone I love so much and that I've neglected horribly lately. Someone I've missed a lot... It just made me happy to read one of her emails again.
I went to see Sylvia with Kirsty (because she had a free ticket). It was actually pretty good. I feel like I need to read The bell jar (is it spelled in two words or one? Dunno...). And I also need to read Orientalism because I am like the only person in my uni who hasn't read it.
I'm finally finding the energy to do new things again. I know, it's a stupid thing, just wanting to read a book I've meant to read for a long time, but it's good. It makes me feel like I'm coming out of my little depressed world. Yes yes yes. Today I've also spent a good two hours cleaning the flat. Tomorrow I'll give a GOOD scrub to the bathroom and the kitchen because they're absolutely disgusting. Mmh.
And you know, even though I'm all on my own at home, I'm quite happy. I can appreciate things like that again... And 15 minutes ago I was running under the rain and I was really cold and the rain was really hurting me but... I was laughing. It was funny. I'm like a little kid, really...

I'm in such a good mood again. The depression is going, and I'm checking back with reality. Yay.
Got another essay back, for South East Asia on film. And I got a 66%! And it was one essay on which I had put a lot of my ideas and opinions and everything, because I only had a couple of articles for it. Very proud. *^^*
I love Hey ya!. Mmh. It's the kind of song that makes me want to bounce around. Like Mokona basically.
I'm all alone in the flat because Soph and Paul are off to Vienna so they're staying at Paul's tonight (his mum he's going to drive them to the airport tomorrow morning). Aaaah! I'm not used to be on my own! And I won't see them for 10 days because I'm leaving on Thursday and they're getting back on Friday, and I'll only be back in London on Monday. Sniff. I've got withdrawal symptoms. *lol* It's just that I'm not used to be in this flat on my own. Oh well, I'll try to take full advantage of it and walk around naked! Eheheh. Only kiddin'.
And I've got a lot of green stuff all for myself... Eheheh. Here I come, my beloved green stuff!

Today I've spent 13 hours at uni, had two lectures, one seminar, loads of rice, indian chicken and samosas, and I did the pub quiz they do in our bar at uni... They asked the most absurd questions, like 'write down three states which have a bird on their flag' (I guessed, by pure chance, Fiji) or 'what is the oldest newspaper in the Southern Emisphere', etc. etc. We didn't do too bad. We got 8 1/2 points out of 20, and apparently Kirsty and Liz on their own never get more than 4! It was really a good laugh, and for once I wasn't sitting at home watching telly (but I OBVIOUSLY had to be back by 10 to watch the new season of ER *lol*).
I also got another essay back today. So far I've got 4 back, and they all went pretty well: two for South East Asian Government & Politics (56% and 65%), one for Theory & Evidence in Contemporary Development (68%) and one for Politics of Development (67%). So, now I've realized that it would be impossible for me to get a I, but a IIi seems very possible (for those of you who do not know about English university, a I or First is 70% or above, and a IIi or Two-One is between 60% and 70%, so I've got a rather high IIi at the moment). Which is nice. And it also means that I haven't been THAT bad this year, which is great. Obviously I've still got exams and next year, but it feels like a good start, and a lot better than last year (when I ended up getting a IIii). So I'm a happy and satisfied girl thankyouverymuch, and now I'll go to sleep because I'm so bloody knackered. ;)

Tom, you know what. You scare me... :) I didn't even know it was a quote. Aaaah. Blissful ignorance of mine. Mmh.
Waiting for my next lecture, another two hours on corruption, this time about Africa (we did East Asia last term...). How interesting and entertaing etc. etc. I was trying to start reading one fo the articles for my next essay (which is about the legitimacy of the Communist Party in Vietnam and the middle-class and all that sort of stuff), but I had to stop because I was falling asleep. First, these Wednesday that start at 7.30 in the morning absolutely kill me (I'm never signing up for a class or tutorial at 9 EVER again); I know I am a lazy cow but being able to sleep until 11 basically everyday and then having to wake up at 7.30 just once a week drives me mad. *sniff* Second, for how much I enjoy South East Asian politics, our reading list is just weird. Why on Earth do I need to read 3 whole books and 10 articles to write one 1500 words essay???
Sometimes I have the feeling that I whine & complain a bit too much. Sooooorry! XD

I never thought I would say this, but... Having the internet at home is weird!!! XD I'm just not used to be able to be sitting her and being able to blog and surf. It's great. And I can connect as much as I want as well, which is nice (it is a shit, slow connection, but oh well).
Even though it was hellish, I'm quite happy I've done the format. My laptop was becoming a bit too fucked up and slow. Mmh. Me is a happy girl.
I went to Fabric on Friday night, my first Drum & Bass night in like 5 months! I do like Drum & Bass, but... I really can't do anything about it, I can't dance to it, at least not for too long. I was talking to Sophie (not my flatmate Sophie, a friend of hers from Cornwall who goes to SOAS) and she was saying that Psychedelic Trance gives you energy. I know it's a bit stupid, but I do think that Psychedelic Trance does 'speak' to your body, it's just... Natural, even though it's electronic music. I know, it doesn't make any sense, but you can't understand until you've been in a club playing Psychedelic Trance and you want to jump around. Shit, I'm becoming a Psychelic girl! *lol*
My hormones are working again. After a month of feeling completely disgusting by men and a week of utter depression (nobody will ever want me and bla bla bla), I'm starting to look at guys again. On Friday night I met this guy... Well, I didn't actually meet him, he was just dancing around me and Shiv, and he was very cute, and I don't know why but when he left he just caressed me on the back, very lightly, and I was just like... "Wow"... I couldn't find him again though, which pissed me off a bit. A missed snog!
I need to get used to blog regularly again. And to decide what is worth writing and what is not... Very weird! So, yeah, as I was saying yesterday, expect a lot more blogging from now on! And I also need to post loooooads of pictures (including pictures of New Year's Eve, the flat, Kirsty's party, The Cross...). Yay! ^_^
[edit] Tom, what do you mean??? -__- I'm not scary. Well, only a bit. Mmh. [/edit]

I... Have... The internet... AT HOME! It's working! I had to format and everything, but at least now it works. Alleluja. *grin*
Expect a lot more blogging from now on!!!