finally in the process of writing my core course essay, which is rather important since it will actually count towards my final mark for the course at the end of the two years (the average of my three core course essays will count for 20%). the thought is slightly scary since nothing i've done until now has actually counted. this oxford way of doing things is utterly confusing and a bit useless, to be perfectly honest, but i don't think complaining will help.
i think i should start complaining less and getting on with it more.
hilary term starts next week and i'm absolutely terrified. it will be hard. i don't think i have the energy for it, despite the very long holidays. why didn't i listen when my second year buddy said to me to be careful and not get burnt out in the first term? sigh. i guess i need some motivation, and i know i'll get there at some point, it's just that right now i really wish everything was different.
everything but the fact that in 10 minutes i will be in dining hall, with my friends and boyfriend, talking and laughing and enjoying myself, and if it wasn't for that i swear i would have quit by now.