June 2007 Archives

i don't really know what to do. i have no desire whatsoever to move into the new room - i can cope with the room itself, but the bathroom? and the disgusting kitchen? i just don't see the point of moving somewhere where i really don't want to be. so i don't really know. plus, of course, the accommodation person is gone today, and i won't be able to do anything until monday. sigh. the plan is to mostly sleep in m's room anyway, but still. if i have to pay for a room (which i have to) at least i want it to be a decent room. i want to be able to cook and have showers in my flat without going 'ewwww' in my head every three seconds.
sigh.
what the hell am i gonna do?

i hate moving. actually, let me rephrase: i hate packing when i have to move, deciding where stuff goes. in my OCD state, i find it incredibly stressful.
the room i'm moving into (for seven weeks, until our two-room flat becomes available) is tiny, but kind of cute. on the third floor of the worst building in college (stairs that smell of nasty food? check. bright orange kitchen cabinets? check. lots of pretty nasty shared bathrooms? check.), it has dark brown carpet but a very pretty window with lots of trees outside, a sloping ceiling and a tiny wardrobe. it's endearing, really. which doesn't mean i'm entirely happy about moving there (i'd much rather stay here, let me tell you!) but it's not as bad as i thought it would be. at least i'm right next to the bathroom and the loo (which is the next one over, so nope, i won't be hearing people peeing all night). in any case the plan is to sleep in m's room as much as possible, so that we can make use of the window ledge to make a double-ish bed.
this morning i was hyperventilating with the stress of having to finish preparing methodology things for my supervisor and pack; now, after putting into storage all of my winter clothing, i feel slightly better. i do have far too much stuff, far, far too much, but i'll cope. and at least m (and maybe other people?) are willing to help, so i don't have to carry mountains of books on my own.
the other thing that calmed me down was, of course, to write a list of what goes where. i'm a big fan of lists, especially because crossing stuff out gives me a huge sense of satisfaction.
that said, it's time to go have dinner and procrastinate a bit.
i'm also obsessed with sim city 4 at the moment, which is a bad thing... but that's for another entry.

exam is done. it went well.
pimm's and champagne have been drunk, and freedom has been celebrated.
my mum and my aunt came to visit, and we saw colleges, drank lots of tea and bought clothes. t'was good. i also finally told my mum i am moving in with m, and she was fine, almost happy she had somewhere new to decorate (i can't wait! i go to the ikea website on a daily basis nowadays).
c.cita is back, and it's awesome. we picked her up this morning, tanned and skinny from africa, and it made me very happy. the plan is to go punting this afternoon, but it seems unlikely with this rainy weather.
other than that, i'm psychologically preparing myself to move out (sigh), store all of my stuff around college for a week, and then move into another room in another block, in which i will be for six weeks until our flat becomes free. in some ways i'm excited about getting to live in yet another room, i can't help it, i love making places mine. at the same time, i'm not so excited about having to share a shower (thank god i'll have my own loo). i'll have to be prepared with gloves and disinfectant for a daily clean of the shower before i wash myself. yes, i'm ocd clean, and i admit it.
other than that, i have a couple of weeks of doing very little in front of me, and then the weekly commutes to london to do my research will start. i'm terrified, but it'll be an awesome experience.
have i told you i've been using the word awesome far too much?

my little toe is slowly recovering. it's still swollen and purple, but at least i can walk like a normal person. the most ridiculous thing? i broke it because i really needed to pee, run into the bathroom and kicked the door really hard. that'll teach me not to wait going to the loo when i need to (gah, i'm like a five year old).
exam is being prepared. i've pretty much mastered the statistics part, and the qualitative research methods are being memorised as we speak. i'm worried that i'm not stressed, and maybe i'm underestimating this. or maybe not. it all seems so easy though, lots of it is just common sense. ethics in research are all about taking responsibility for what you do with the people researched, the public and the discipline. duh?
i guess i'll just re-read and make sure it's all in my head tomorrow.
and then on wednesday... i shall be going punting, and drink some, and possibly lie around watching tv for a few days. it's going to be awesome.
(even though, again, i'm supposed to be reading theoretical/practical stuff on interviewing for my research this summer... it is neverending)

...shit.
i've broken the little toe in my left foot.
let me tell you, it hurts like a bitch.
sigh.

argh. revising this stuff is so boring. i can't concentrate (partly because of anti-histamines, partly because of just sheer tiredness) so it's not going so well. at the same time this stuff's so basic it's taken me one day to take notes and mostly revise two whole topics.
of course qualitative research methods are just a load of waffling (pure common sense, i'm telling you) and the stats part will be slightly harder, but then again... don't have a lot to revise there either. i just want to get it over and done with.
i want summer and my research, even though interviewing for the first time scares the crap out of me.
duh, i think it'll have to be friends now, because i really can't be bothered anymore.