It's back to the frantic clicking on the word count button, and the increasingly confusing piles of articles and photocopied chapters, and continued desperate attempts of procrastination. This time, I am slowly coming out of the rut, and I've started writing this damn 5,000 word essay. Which is always a great improvement! So the plan is: if I can finish two sections (or two and a half) today, and the remaining two (or one and a half) tomorrow, I can then write introduction and conclusion on Monday and send it off.
What makes me feel a lot better is that I've realised I actually know quite a lot about the Indian diaspora (the topic of this essay). I felt that because of my lack of enthusiasm for writing this (not the actual subject, just the writing!), I wasn't absorbing any of the information, but as it turns out... That was bollocks.
Anyway, next week I am going to be a busy busy bee. Finishing this draft off, going back to the big report draft (and hopefully finishing it off), and then go back to this essay once I get it back with comments, and hand it in. And then I need to start writing my thesis, oh, the joy!
Basically my holiday in Japan over Christmas will be my only moment of calm from now until June next year... Realising that is what, I think, is making me feel a little more motivated. Yesterday I started looking at my Rough Guide to Japan, and it got me so very excited. It also is very very helpful that M. has family in Osaka, which will be our base for most of the trip, which means: savings on accommodation = more spending on shopping. I want to buy lots of pretty Japanese things, and see many temples, and sleep in a Ryokan for at least a night, and jump in glee whenever I can. Can you tell I'm actually getting slightly overexcited about this?
Now it's time to have lunch. I'm dieting (GI diet all the way, even if I will occasionally have to disagree with its banning of alcohol and coffee) and it's actually great. I have quite a bit of energy, and feel very awake, which is a first in quite a while. Now I'm just hoping that it'll actually make me lose weight, because I am really struggling with this thing (putting on 20 kgs in two years is never a happy surprise).
I feel better today. Less discouraged.