When I was 15 or 16, my dream was actually to become either an interior designer or an architect. Around the age of 17, my (technical) drawing teacher was so impressed with my skills, that she told me I should absolutely become an architect. Then, for a whole lot of reasons, some to do with my mother being convinced I would be unable to get a job as an architect, some to do with the fact that I spent some time with a friend of my parents' who's worked in NGOs/aid for twenty years, I abandoned that dream and decided Development Studies was the thing for me.
I realise now, possibly too late, that it might have been a mistake. One big realisation of the last few months has been that, fundamentally, I do not want to work for an NGO. The UN, the European Parliament, DfID, maybe, but most definitely not NGOs. So in some ways I've come to believe that the I shouldn't have done the undergrad and postgrad courses I've done. This is not to say I didn't enjoy them or I wasn't good at them - I'm not stupid, I know that much, and consequently I've done very well in my discipline (even though not even well enough to be able to do a PhD in Oxford, not that I would want to!). But I do feel like there is a basic passion lacking, something is missing.
On the other hand, like my parents before me, I am extremely passionate when it comes to decoration, furniture, and generally things that make houses pretty. Hence my excitement about the new flat, and the fact that it comes unfurnished, which gives me the freedom of making a home for M and I (limited by money, of course, but better than nothing!).
So I've just spent the afternoon preparing inspiration boards of what I want our future flat to look like; the look will have to be built over time, since we won't be able to buy some things immediately (but you can bet I'll start saving ASAP for those few designer pieces!).
A bit of an explanation: the living, dining and study areas will all actually be in one, big room, which also will have the kitchen at one end. Basically it'll just be one big open plan living space. The bedroom, on the other hand, is separate, and is actually relatively big (big enough for the furniture in the board anyway!).


I wonder if I'll ever make anything of this passion. Probably not know, but who knows what'll happen in the future... In the meantime I'm enjoying this whole new flat business enormously. And have just had the piss taken out of me heavily by the lovely RJ, who thanks to me now feels like a normal human being.